I HATE FUR COATS!!! They are such a gross display of arrogance. In a vast majority of the cases I’ve seen, the narcissistic wearer voicelessly screams, “Eh Em. May I have everyone’s attention, please? Over here!!! Excuse me, you’re not looking. Yeah you. Thanks…” I went out for my birthday a couple weekends ago and was having a good ole’ time, as I modestly two stepped to the blaring music, holding my Vodka and pineapple juice in my hand, and in walked two guys, both wearing fur coats. One had on a white one and the other a black one, both sported shades in the barely lit club/lounge, nonetheless. Immediately I gasped, completely star struck at the sight of the The Dalmations of Hip-Hop, Rin and Tin. You know, from the movie Brown Sugar. Anyway, I was forced to firmly grasp the railing that stood in close proximity to me, with both hands, so I wouldn’t do anything too groopie-ish as they passed me. They got closer, my grip began to slip due to the nervous sweat my palms produced. Closer. CLOSER. Then my celebrity spotting high diminished as I realized that it wasn’t them. MUTHER@#$%^*!!! GOT DAMNIT!!! I released my white knuckle grip and composed myself, assuring that no one saw my somewhat uncontrollable, often embarrassing, reaction to celebritIes.  As the blood returned to my knuckles, the two cornballs walked past me and the white fur wearer had on a beige knit skull cap. Wow, what an innovative technique, combining the ‘nostrils to the sky’ ambiance of the mink with the slightly hood feel of the scully.  NICE!!! Stumbling through the crowd, barely able to see out of their “Stunner Shades” they passed me by. At that moment I had P.E.T.A’s number up on my cell phone, ready to press SEND and yell into m phone, “Bust out the red paint”, but something caught my eye on the floor of the club. White Mink Man’s coat was shedding, leaving a trail of curly faux fur wherever he walked.  I was shocked with pleasure at the site of this attention seekers failed attempt at “Ballers Status”. Okay, it really wasn’t shedding, but that did make the story better. Anyway, I’ll leave you guys with these flicks…… 

 

 

DAMN FOOL!!!!!!                      

R.I.P PINKY....

R.I.P PINKY....

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Comments
  1. 2partssoul says:

    Somebody please que the “ho is mine”. Too funny.

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